Monday, May 9, 2011

letting it sink in

Here I am sitting in a room stacked with boxes and boxes of things accumulated over the past few years and boxes that hold some precious an priceless memories. I have invested four years of my life to learning about people and the way the mind works. I have spent four years building relationships with some world class people. I have spent four years waiting for the day it is over...and Saturday that day came. On the one hand college graduation was nothing like I thought it would be, but on the other it is everything I thought it would be. I thought that I would be sad and cry. I thought I would feel a weight lifted as I walked that stage and realized I was truly done. I thought I would feel something. Truth be told...I don't feel much of anything yet. I knew it would take a while for me to realize I am done, and that is quite true. I knew that I would feel some sadness but ultimately leave knowing that those I have invested time in these past four years are not leaving my life forever. Sure we will not be within the same 2 mile radius any longer...but they are still going to be a part of my story and parts of my story that have yet to be written. I feel sad that I am not within walking distance of them all but I also know that this is not goodbye, or the end.

Walking that stage on Saturday I felt a sense of accomplishment, as if all the blood sweat and tears were suddenly worth it. I felt incredible gratitude for the support of my parents and family. I felt so much love that day. People genuinely cared about my accomplishment and were there to celebrate me and they were proud of me. There is something about people you love and respect being proud of you that makes you walk a little taller. So, to my friends and family that have supported me these years, thank you. You all are so special to me and play such a role in my life and I appreciate each and every one of you.

So this all leaves me here, in the stacks of boxes, unpacking memories and times I will cherish. Unpacking the stress and the hard times that I have faced during my time at APU. I will unpack with the future in mind, my marriage that is coming so soon, realizing the things I will need to be rid of in order to combine our two lives. I will unpack all of these things and feel the excitement of the next chapter, clearing out things that were from the previous.

With love from the stacks of boxes,

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